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Jesus

Created by cgdesign. Last Edited by cutestuser. Tagged as: Books, Ideas, People
Jesus
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Jesus (7–2 BC/BCE to 26–36 AD/CE), also known as Jesus of Nazareth, was a 1st century Jewish leader who is the central figure of Christianity, and is also an important figure in several other religions. He is also called Jesus Christ, where "Christ" is a title derived from the Greek Χριστός (Christós), meaning the "Anointed One," which corresponds to the Hebrew-derived "Messiah". The name "Jesus" is an Anglicization of the Greek Ίησους (Iēsous), itself a Hellenization of the Hebrew יהושע (Yehoshua) or Hebrew-Aramaic ישוע (Yeshua), meaning "YHWH rescues".

 

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gendo
gendo posted over 2 years ago

I have heard that he healed people just by touching them… I wonder if he ever had any trouble with the authorities after “healing” children.

ryan
ryan posted over 2 years ago

We need to add a category called ‘the Best Prophet’ and have a dance off.

Kittyn
Kittyn posted over 2 years ago

I think his the tops, he speaks to me all the time and we hang out and do stuff and junk.

anthropapologist
anthropapologist posted over 2 years ago

Yeah, Jesus is pretty cool. Just look at his eyes in this picture – the guy’s loaded on something. Every time I see him, he’s carrying his little box and floating on clouds. It’s all good.

gendo
gendo posted over 2 years ago

Jesus is a Jerk. If he were so enlightened, he would have observed the prime directive. Him and his Father had been tinkering around with matter and time and civilisation, all the while in a bitter temporal cold war with Satan. I mean these guys are thugs. What the fuck has Satan have , apart from the universe’s largest combined casio/fetish club/monster truck rally, to defend himself with? The holy fucking trinity are ganging up on him, along with all of his angels and shit and poor old Satan only has his cunning and guile (and Saddam Housein) to defend himself with. Jesus, you sir, are a cocksucker. You need to go hang out with Satan in hell for a while, get laid, play a round of blackjack or roulette, or perhaps watch a monster truck rally, but what ever you decide, you need to chill the fuck out. In the words of the great prophet of hell, Saddam Housein, Jesus you need to “Relax Guy!!!”

mario64
mario64 posted over 2 years ago

if i didnt know better i would say you’re sympathising with satan gendo. But make no mistake he’s not a human with a conscience and morals. he will not think twice to dump anyone in the ditch he’s in now. he knows his time is short so bring on the casinos and hookers.

Jesus cares, and about authorities, he’s the authority. Without him we wont have any authority.

emoolilu
emoolilu posted over 2 years ago

I’ve always been strangely turned-on when people say “jebus” instead of “jesus”.

ChuckNoritz
ChuckNoritz posted over 2 years ago

Over-rated.

NimbleMarmoset
NimbleMarmoset posted over 2 years ago

he’s all right, I suppose…

itsme
itsme posted over 2 years ago

make fun of him, ... but he’s the very best and he loves u more than u can imagine. search him and u will find him. best way 2 do this would be asking a christian about him or starting to read the bible. do not miss the chance

devoteegirl
devoteegirl posted over 2 years ago

Jesus was black!

Lya
Lya posted over 2 years ago

How can you assert “We all like him too.”? I don’t care a pap for him.

Nasef
Nasef posted over 2 years ago

Religion sucks enough said.

Boomstam
Boomstam posted over 2 years ago

good or bad…. but all of us have an opinion about Him

PhoenixRavenflame
PhoenixRavenflame posted about 1 year ago

It’s kind of silly to put Jesus in the “Best Christian” category… what with him being a Jew, and all.

seadoopsycho007
seadoopsycho007 posted about 1 year ago

ya Jesus is my homeboy. you jews can suck it.

thatsmith
thatsmith posted about 1 year ago

Happy 2007th birthday, you crazy Jewish man you.

XxC0bHCxX
XxC0bHCxX posted about 1 year ago

Jesus is the man.

abcdef04
abcdef04 posted about 1 year ago

hey everybody

Kai
Kai posted about 1 year ago

Jebus is watching over us… Just like Santa. I bet Santa is Jebus’s homie. They probably sit up there with their asses hanging over a cloud shitting on piegons. That’s what I’d do if I was Jebus.

Fenix_t
Fenix_t posted about 1 year ago

Mi mejor y único amigo

kadjach
kadjach posted about 1 year ago

You are making fun of the KING OF KINGS …!!!! and the funny thing about it is that YOU ARE ALL HIS SONS AND DAUGHTERS ….& HE LOVES YOU STILL !!! But if you dont repent and turn to him and accept his Love for us, U WILL b standin on the Left come the day of Judgement….!!! I see people here saying they dont give a pap about Jesus…He gave EVERY pap for U…..U still drinking his water, eating his food, inhaling His air…& when u make love to your spouse…its He who created it for us to enjoy….!!! Wen u look at your kids everyday…It is He who gave them life….You guys NEEEED to go outside and LOOK AROUND …(for those who can)...SMELL, TOUCH , LISTEN….GOD in has LOOKED out for ALL human beings…SATAN is the culprit who causes suicide murders in schools…God created a world of beauty! It is us that allowed Satan to turn it into what it is today…so i want to say…Stop! while you still have life (and make NO mistake…u Will die One DAY – ANYDAY )...TURN TO JESUS CHRIST !!!!

Kai
Kai posted about 1 year ago

Firstly kadjach, I’m sure if Jebus was real the first thing he’d say to you was “stop molesting the caps lock key asshole.” Secondly, he’d say “WTF is a ‘pap.’ Satan doesn’t cause suicide, depression and shit does. I’m sure we’re all aware we’re going to die one day. Anyone who believes they’re immortal probably has bigger problems than repenting. Jebus is a hypocrite. He forgives all of us. Yet if we test drive before we buy we’re sinners and go to hell, if we accidentally test drive someone of the same sex when we’re drunk we’re sinners and go to hell, if we throw our neighbour off a cliff we’re sinners and go to hell – we’re not allowed to do anything fun. :( If Jebus is real, I’m going to Hell and I’m going to enjoy it – it always seemed a little gay to me to wear a white dress and skip through the clouds with a little harp anyway.

XxC0bHCxX
XxC0bHCxX posted about 1 year ago

Why the Fuck are you calling him Jebus thats so stupid

Kai
Kai posted about 1 year ago

Because ‘Fictional Child Molestor Worshipped by Gullible Douchebags’ takes too long to type.

Kai
Kai posted about 1 year ago

And because Emoolilu is strangely turned on by it.

XxC0bHCxX
XxC0bHCxX posted about 1 year ago

Whatever.

jamiep
jamiep posted about 1 year ago

have you read what he said? don’t think people should comment until they’ve read what he said.

Kai
Kai posted about 1 year ago

What who said?

Vano
Vano posted about 1 year ago

What makes you think we don’t know about why he said all that stuff about it? We don’t even know why we ran into it, it was really more of an accident, so stop it.

Vano
Vano posted about 1 year ago

I am the Jesus incarnate. This is not a test. An experiment? Maybe. Eat me. Drink me. On your knees. Every last one of you.

emoxrocker
emoxrocker posted about 1 year ago

kneels down oh hail thee

emoxrocker
emoxrocker posted about 1 year ago

Mighty, mighty man.

XxC0bHCxX
XxC0bHCxX posted about 1 year ago

To me people have the right to belive there is a God or not a God. So Just let people belive whatever the Fuck they want to.

Vano
Vano posted about 1 year ago

No. And just for that, I’m not going to save you. Ungrateful bastard.

Vano
Vano posted about 1 year ago

I don’t mind Jesus, so much as what he has created due to misunderstanding. I’m curious if Blake or Seadoo understand the meaning of “nonresistance to evil” or “Love thy neighbor”. I’m also curious as to how Seadoo could say “You Jews can suck it” since it is a well known fact that Jesus was Jewish. Mission trips, religion wars, misquoting the Bible, American Conservative views (which once again contradict the true teachings of Jesus)... all of it is so confusing. Christianity wouldn’t be so disgusting if people weren’t so ignorant about what their own book tells them. I guess that’s true of any religion though.

loniandjesus
loniandjesus posted about 1 year ago

All that I know is that I’m loved and I don’t deserve to be by the one I fail on a day to day basis. Well, that’s not all I know haha, but Lord knows I love him.

gbman
gbman posted about 1 year ago

Jesus is my strength.

sweetiegenie
sweetiegenie posted about 1 year ago

Jesus is my savior and Christ. I love him more than anything and he is the reason i breathe WHY !? cuz he loved me first and he’ll always love me.

pianoplayer
pianoplayer posted about 1 year ago

Jesus was a very cool man. I think the Christians after him messed everything up. I feel what he wanted for all of humanity, not just christians was messed up by his followers.

Vano
Vano posted about 1 year ago

Here here.

Inguz
Inguz posted about 1 year ago

It’s too bad they founded a crappy religion around this good man.

XLolaBabyX
XLolaBabyX posted about 1 year ago

Jesus is my Homeboy so lay off! Geez….

Clarabella
Clarabella posted about 1 year ago

Inguz you are soooo right! :)

Saddam
Saddam posted about 1 year ago

too much hate for me to believe – god should be more conpassionate.

gbman
gbman posted about 1 year ago

All very interesting comments, really. For me personally, Jesus resides in my heart. He has helped me through so much, good and bad. It’s a comfort to know that he is always with me.

emoolilu “Jebus?”

Nick_raccoon
Nick_raccoon posted about 1 year ago

How do you know he is with you gbman?

sorry, just curious….;)

Saddam
Saddam posted about 1 year ago

Even if i did have the ability to believe – i might choose the wrong religion and be eternally damned. I call for God and co to show himself and sort out the mess he has created – too much killing and hate!

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